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G8 Mulls Qaeda Offer to End Modern Civilization

(2005-07-07) -- Leaders of the world's major industrialized nations, meeting in Scotland at the G8 Summit today, said they would consider al-Qaeda's latest proposal to "end modern civilization and return to the glorious days of feudalism."

The al-Qaeda offer came in the form of multiple explosions during rush hour in London, drenching buses and trains with the blood of ordinary working people.

"Modern civilization had a good long run," said one unnamed global diplomat, "and these Qaeda chaps have made a serious proposal that one must consider. It should spark thoughtful discussion at the G8 about whether Western values have become obsolete in the face of the growing popularity of this progressive Islamic lifestyle."

In related news, we're all Britons now.